


If Homosexuality Isn't Contagious, Why Do I Have Homosexual Thoughts When My Gay Friend Takes His Shirt Off?

by Lilacer



Series: Zerophilia Expansion Pack [1]
Category: Zerophilia (2006)
Genre: F/M, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Sexual Identity, Trans Character, tho only for like 5 seconds lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 19:04:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7280917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilacer/pseuds/Lilacer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luke never expected to find himself waking up next to a guy, especially not someone he’d call his boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If Homosexuality Isn't Contagious, Why Do I Have Homosexual Thoughts When My Gay Friend Takes His Shirt Off?

**Author's Note:**

> tfw your laptop's broken so you write fanfics on your phone

Luke never expected to find himself waking up next to a guy, especially not someone he’d call his boyfriend. It had been almost a week since he got back together with Michelle, and things had been fucking incredible. Honestly, it felt like a dream, and he was always worried he’d wake up to find the past days were simply his imagination. But this morning felt more like a nightmare.

He realized he’d been with Max in even more intimate circumstances before, but that was in the heat of the moment and he hadn’t had time to think. This was different. Luke woke up with Max’s arm around him and his face nestled against Max’s shoulder. It was embarrassing to say, but he panicked. He woke up against Max before, but that was as Luca. There was a layer of separation then, where he could pretend it was normal, something acceptable. This? Not so easy.

Max was still asleep, gently breathing and holy shit was Luke’s arm on his chest? Yes, yes it was. He was still frozen in fear, unwilling to move in case Max woke up. He wasn’t ready to deal with him just yet. So Luke’s hand stayed, feeling the warmth of his boyfriend. God, that was so weird to think about. But there was something nice about just laying here like this. And glancing down at where his hand rest, he was grateful for the fact that Max was sleeping shirtless. Because, damn, he never met a guy with such a nice chest. If he had, he surely hadn’t noticed, but how could you not notice Max when he was always running around with his shirt wide open?

A blush crawled up Luke’s face as he realized what he was thinking. Okay, so Max was hot. He knew this. How many times had he thought the same thing as Luca and even acted on it? These were probably just some residual feelings! And there wasn’t anything inherently gay about recognizing another man as attractive.

Shit. He thought it. The word he was avoiding. Fuck. How many times had he denied any association with being gay? Maybe it didn’t count if he was a Z. Really, how could you not like guys if you were a girl half the time? Except… Dr. Katchadorian kind of proved that wrong. Fuck.

Max stirred, turning his head to face Luke and making a little sleepy grumble that Luke deemed unfairly cute and not at all helpful with his current situation. He looked up to Max’s face, unable to believe how close they were. He was so peaceful, completely calm and vulnerable in a way Luke had never really seen before. There was a gentle kindness in his expression, unlike his usual persona of indifference. Luke noticed an eyelash on his cheek, and before he could stop himself he was gently touching Max’s face.

The motion disturbed Max, causing him to groan and stretch. Luke quickly moved back, feeling as though he was freed from a trance. He felt guilty, as Max was now waking up because he couldn’t control his damn hand.

Max’s eyes flickered open, and he looked over to where Luke was now sitting a foot away. He propped himself up, moving closer to where Luke was once again frozen. “Morning, babe.”

Luke felt a shiver go up his spine in response to Max’s pet name. It was weird, being called babe by another guy, but he felt so happy about it. “You, uh, have something right here.” He stuttered out, gesturing to his own cheek. God, why was he so nervous! Max ran his hand over his own face, but the eyelash remained. “You didn’t get it, let me, uh-” Luke found himself getting closer to Max once again, brushing the eyelash off himself.

“Thanks,” Max smiled. “You have something on your face, too.”

“What-” Max placed his hand on Luke’s face, and Luke couldn’t help but notice how much larger it was than Michelle’s, but so similar. He made eye contact with Max, stunned once again by their sharp color. Max closed his eyes and Luke was a little mad because of it, but the feeling quickly faded when Max started kissing him. Luke’s stomach dropped, scared and nervous despite all the times he had kissed Max and Michelle. It was just like that first time, when he was Luca and met Max at the abandoned warehouse. It was strange and terrifying, but only because it felt so good. But just as he had pushed away then, he pushed away now, afraid of his own enjoyment.

“Unfair…” Luke huffed, the two of them breathing heavily.

“I’m sorry, you were just so cute with your guard down like that.” Max pulled Luke closer, and without thinking Luke pushed him away again. Max was shocked, and Luke immediately felt guilty.

“Sorry…”

“No, I get it.” He got out of bed, putting some distance between the two of them. “I have to go to work, anyway.” He quickly gathered his clothes and left.

Luke flopped down on the bed, confused and angry at himself and Max. Why did he have to do that? Did Max not even notice that this was the first time they’d kissed like this? Why’d he have to be so damn familiar all the time? Calling him babe like this? He didn’t even stop to think about Luke’s feelings. But Luke was equally pissed at himself for pushing Max away.

It was hard to wrap his head around liking a guy. It was new and terrifying, something his father definitely would not have approved. Then again, Dad probably wouldn’t have been too happy about his son being his daughter sometimes. It just made him feel like their relationship was back to square one, making him shake and trip over words just like when he asked Michelle out that first time. But for Max, there was no reset. He’d been a Z for so long there was probably nothing to it. Max and Michelle were one and the same, and he didn’t bother to hide it around people who knew. Max probably felt the same about Luke before Luke knew he was his girlfriend.

Luke had a sudden epiphany. Looking back on when he first met Max, suddenly every weird thing he did made sense. Cheering for him during a little hockey game? He liked him and they had literally gone on dates together. Coming over to his house and asking for help learning the game? He wanted to get closer to him as a guy. Getting overly mad when he stood Michelle up? No shit! He was the one who was left behind at the restaurant. It was no wonder Max was so familiar with him as a guy after all the time they spent together. Hell, he knew Luke longer before they were actually dating than Luke had know Michelle. God, it was still weird to think that he was dating a guy.

Luke could keep pretending otherwise, but he really did love Max. If Dr. Katchadorian was anything to go by, being a Z didn’t really change anything about you. Sydney tried his damn best to change himself, but he was still a gay man in the end, despite what body he was stuck in. Luke couldn’t deny that he was in love with Max when he was Luca. But maybe Max was just his exception. He loved Michelle, and they were kind of the same person, so maybe it was just one guy. Wait, could he even call Max a guy? Hadn’t Michelle talked to him about it, said she was bigender or something? Ugh, this was all so complicated.

But… looking back over things, maybe Max wasn’t the only guy he had liked. He didn’t really want to think about it, but it was introspection time so this needed to be analyzed. He liked plenty of girls in the past, so he knew he definitely wasn’t gay. But, he kind of did idolize that one upperclassmen on the hockey team in high school. He thought he was attractive, but more as recognition that he was popular with the girls at school. Or was it? He was a little too happy when he broke up with his girlfriend, but that was just because he was spending more time with her than with the team. Wait, that kind of sounded like jealousy. Shit.

Okay, so maybe he had liked two guys in his life. Or maybe more. There was that one kid in middle school, and his friend in elementary… It may have been more than incidental. Luke clearly had a pattern of mislabeling his crushes on guys as jealousy of their success. And if there was one guy Luke had recently been extremely jealous of, it was Max. His cooler-than-you attitude, hyper-masculine mechanical work, and rugged good looks… it was just easier for Luke to pretend he hated him.

Fuck, did this make things complicated. Michelle mentioned she was bisexual. Was Luke bi too? It made sense, based on what Michelle said. Luke could help but laugh at himself, not realizing he was bi until after he was dating a guy and a girl (and having gay sex with them (more than once)).

As great as personal discoveries were, this still didn’t fix the fact that he was nervous around Max and had been an ass to him earlier. And he kind of needed to get over it because Michelle had to go to class tomorrow. Just what he needed, a time limit.

Luke realized he’d wasted too much time laying in bed thinking, and finally decided to make himself productive. He probably had some reading due tomorrow, which he hadn’t bothered to look at or think about until just now.

\---

Max had royally fucked up, again. Really, how many times was he going to overstep Luke’s boundaries before he learned his lesson? He realized that everything about their relationship was new to Luke, but whenever it came down to it he ended up pushing too far. Like this morning. In retrospect, Luke’s distance made perfect sense. No shit, straighty-mcstraighterson might be a little uncomfortable making out with a guy. Hell, it was unreasonable to assume Luke would take things like he did. Max was lucky, because she had already realized she fucking loved girls before any genetic mutations decided to appear. Why would Luke “I’m totally not gay” adapt as quickly as she did?

So here he was, fixing another car that had been neglected by its owner, trying to think of the right way to apologize without making things worse. No touching was probably a good ground rule to set, and definitely no kissing (even though inviting Luke to a match of tonsil hockey was still a hilarious joke, no matter how much Luke insisted it had gotten old). Fucking Luke made this so hard. Why did he have to be so damn cute?

Max’s apology planning was rudely interrupted when the person he least expected to see walked into the garage. Luke waved, taking a stool away from a tool bench and sitting next to the car Max was working on. “I see you still don’t know how to wear a shirt.”

“Didn’t expect to see you here.” Max smiled, restraining himself from getting any closer to where Luke was sitting (or offering to take his shirt off).

“Well, studying sucks, and what better way to distract myself than to come over here and distract you.” Luke casually replied. Was that meant to be an innuendo? No, Max was definitely reading too much into that distraction.

“Trying to get me to lose my job, are you?” Max laughed in response.

“Maybe. Then you’d have more time for me.” Okay, Max definitely wasn’t reading too much into that. He didn’t know how to respond while staying within Luke’s comfort zone. Hell, where even was Luke’s comfort zone?

“Two words.” Luke said suddenly.

“What?”

“We played this game before. Ask a question, two word responses. I go first.” Max had no idea where Luke was heading with this.

“Why did you become Michelle, that first day we met?”

Max didn’t have to think back very hard, clearly remembering the first time he saw his boyfriend. “Honest answer?”

“No shit.” Luke punched him in the arm. Good sign, initiating physical contact.

“Distracting boner.”

Luke sputtered, clearly unprepared for the honest response he wanted. “What? You’re joking.” Max simply smirked at his boyfriend, causing him to be even more embarrassed. “Oh my god that’s how Michelle got there so fast.”

“What can I say? You’re cute.” Max immediately regretted the statement, hoping it wouldn’t be too much for Luke. However, it had the right effect, as Luke couldn’t help but smile to himself. “And it seemed like you’d be more receptive to a beautiful girl working on your truck. I think I guessed right.”

“Modest, aren’t you.” Luke laughed.

“My turn.” Max gestured to Luke with the wrench in his hand, deciding to push the issue a little. “When did you realize you liked me?”

Luke took a second to think before replying, “Campus meeting.”

“What? Oh, tricky. I meant you first liking Max-”

“That’s a separate question, wait your turn.” Max grumbled in response, unable to fight the arbitrary rules of this dumb game.

“When did you first realize I was a Z?”

Max didn’t even have to think about that one. “I’m Luca.”

“What? Immediate recognition?” Luke actually seemed surprised that his friend’s shitty cover story didn’t work.

“Next time, why don’t you try actually changing your name if you want to be disguised? And you look basically the same.”

“That was why we were related!”

“If anyone names their kid the same thing as their cousin, I pity that poor child. That’s lack of creativity right there.”

Luke leaned closer into the car Max was working on, saying much quieter, “I guess it’s nice to know you weren’t cheating on me when you were flirting with Luca.”

“Though, a certain someone felt it was fine to fool around with the local sexy mechanic despite dating a girl.” Max coughed, looking at Luke. “But who could blame her for falling for such a gorgeous, talented man.”

Like rolled his eyes at Max’s dramatics. “Are you going to ask your question or not.”

“Of course! So, when did you first start liking that hunky garage boy?”

Luke bit his cheek, still embarrassed to talk about his attraction to Max. “First Luca.”

Max booed, “Come on, why’d it take you so long?” Max noticed a blush raising up Luke’s face.

“I certainly thought you were attractive when I first met you, but I guess I realized I had a shot when I was a girl.”

“Ah, the good ol’ heterosexual assumption. It can really get you into trouble sometimes.”

“You did the same thing when we first met! And I even assumed I was straight at the time.”

“Wait a minute, did I just hear Straight Luke say he wasn’t straight?”

“Please don’t call me that.”

“When did you figure it out?”

“Is that a two word question?”

“No, no this is a life question.”

“If I’m being honest then today, after you left. Turns out I’m bi. I think.”

“That’s a little… Late.”

“I’ve realized it.”

“But good for you! Welcome to the queer club.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

“While we’re on the topic,” Max put down his tools, coming to stand beside Luke. “I realized I should have asked you earlier, but, what are you comfortable doing like this? Because I kind of fucked up today.”

“No, no, that was me! I’m just still a little wary about being with a guy. But I want to get better with it.”

“Don’t force yourself! People don’t change overnight.”

“I still want to try. Can hold your hand?”

“It’s dirty, but-” Luke reached out, grabbing Max’s hand tightly. It was… nice, a little shaky, but nice. But Luke quickly withdrew, instead opting to suddenly hug Max, almost knocking him off balance.

“This is too easy…” Luke mumbled into Max’s shoulder. He pulled his head up, locking eyes with his boyfriend. “Can I… kiss you again?”

Max couldn’t say no to that. This time, Luke was ready, and he made the first move. It was blissful, unique from their kisses between Luke and Michelle and Max and Luca (and even Michelle and Luca, which Luke couldn’t remember but it probably happened). Between the two of them, something just clicked. And Luke could definitely see himself getting used to this.

\---

Keenan was headed over to the garage, hoping to find Max for Janine. She wanted to talk to him about one of her social issues or something, but she was too lazy to bike over to the shop. And Keenan was a good boyfriend, so here he was, fulfilling her wishes.

Keenan walked up to the open garage and almost called out for Max when he saw him standing behind one of the cars with it’s hood open. Making out with his still-male best friend. Why did he always have to walk in on this?

**Author's Note:**

> I like that this fandom decided that oral will only change one of them to explain that last scene.


End file.
